Blogology 202

Some months ago I attempted to secure advertising for my blog. And why not? It's income and, who knows, there might actually be businesses out there who could appreciate the mighty clout of my endorsement. But, since the Tiger Woods scandal, businesses have been . . . well, skittish at best, and many have pulled the plug on their celebrity endorsements. Still, in case there are businesses out there who are looking for people like me to endorse their products, here are a few products that I might consider supporting.

ShamWow

I've never used a ShamWow, but boy would I love to! I mean, I can't write on this blog all day, and a ShamWow would be the perfect fit for me. I could use it to clean the keyboard on my twelve year old computer, since the greasy build up on the "F", "J" and "Spacebar" keys is enormous. If I were arrested for, say, shoplifting a Garden Weasel, the police could identify me from the fingerprints lifted from my computer keyboard. They wouldn't have to use fingerprint dust. They could just remove the prints from the keys by prying the grease up with a screwdriver. Yes, I'd say a ShamWow endorsement would be just the ticket for me. What a cleaning tool!

Dog Biscuits

My dog loves 'em, and so do I.

Pillows

I have no idea who invented the pillow, or what companies manufacture pillows today, but I'd endorse any style or variety (except dainty decorative pillows used by old ladies at tea parties). Having a pillow advertisement on my blog would be unique, as I don't think I've seen an advertisement for pillows . . . EVER! So, let me be the first celebrity to say, "I love my pillow. I take it with me on vacations. I use it to prop myself up in bed while reading trashy romance novels. I also write trashy romance novels using my pillow. I have been using the same pillow for thirty years and it has not yet fallen apart. So, my pillow is well-made. That's a testimony, folks. Get a pillow like mine. Oh, and yes . . . my wife and I use pillows for other entertainment, too. (Details can be found on my auxiliary blog: http://www.pillowtalkwithtoddy.com/)."

Paper Plates

I would love to endorse these. They are not only good for meals, but also can be used for crafts, scrap booking, and for notepaper when I have to go to the grocery store. I love 'em. I have a closet full of 'em. Yes, I would definitely endorse paper plates (and let me expand that to include any paper products like cups, napkins and such, you get my drift). If I lived alone, I would eat off of paper plates exclusively. I would use one paper plate per week. I can give a testimony as to how this can be done. Don't wash 'em. Yes, I could definitely see a paper plate ad on my blog.

Advertisers . . . please call me. Let's work something out.