Friday, September 30, 2011

My New Job

Perhaps it's this blog, or it may just be that time of the year, but I've got a new job.  Or, I should say, another job:  Book Reviewer.

Any day now I'll be receiving the first of several books that I will be reviewing for a magazine/web site.  Should be fun.  I get to read the galleys of books before they are published and offer my thumbs up or thumbs down. I love the power.  Makes me feel like Little Caesar at the Colosseum when he ordered his first pizza and condemned the gladiators to death by breadstick.  Caesar also forced the women gladiators to carry signs through the red light district in Rome that read:  $5 Hot-n Ready.  I can't wait to dig into these pages . . . .

Of course, I've been reviewing books on this blog for years. My own reading, anyway.  Now I get to review books that I may not otherwise want to read.

Toward that end, it might be a good thing to practice my reviewing skills.  I'd like to create some phrases that only I will use.  These, I hope, can become a signature or trademark for this Book Reviewer.

My Patented Phrases:

The author is a "nut job".

Woooaaaa, Momma!

This is one humdinger of a book!

The reader would be "nuts" to shell out $19.95 for this in hardback when she could buy it on Kindle format for $9.95.

This book is "nuts".

Am I "nuts" or does this book read like it was written by a drunk?

This book is a "mixed bag" of nuts.

This reviewer's wife has read the book first and she is of the opinion that I would be wasting my time reading it at all, so, although this month's review column was to be about the title--The Old Folks Home, by Jerry Attrick--I'll be reviewing Peering Under the Bleachers, by Seymor Butts. 

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