Thursday, September 8, 2011

$40 Royalty

I received my first semi-annual royalty check yesterday, which represents six months of book sales.  Total check received: $40.42.  And this from a book that actually sold some significant copies.

The publisher has done quite well by me, but I've been considering my options for my new-found windfall.  At less than a quarter a day earnings, I could save up for a couple of days and buy a gumball from one of those arcade dispensers . . . I think those are still a quarter.  (I'd hope for a blue one!)  Or I could buy my wife a nice bouquet of flowers.  Or I could do what I always do with such filthy lucre and just give it away.  The latter always seems to be the best option to me.

My wife, of course, considers that 22 cents per day and always asks, "Why do you continue to write so many books when this is the reward you get?"

Always a good question . . . so let me elucidate here.

I will continue to write for 22 cents per day (or for less than 10 cents per hour) in the hope that I might earn a dollar an hour some day.  A dollar an hour is a good round number and would allow me to buy a Wendy's sandwich (value menu) each afternoon.  I'd enjoy a bacon cheeseburger, actually, and if I had change left over, I'd be happy to return the change to the publisher so they could re-up or give me a new contract for another book and, hence, send me even still smaller royalty checks.

Or . . . I'd write for nothing (as I do in most cases now).  The publishers would know they could put me on a list of "wimps" and could call me up whenever they needed free labor.  I'm their man.  No one does free better than me.

Or . . . and this is my real motivation . . . I will continue to write because there are editors out there who have not met me yet.  They seem to like what I write, and they will believe that this time, they've struck gold.  There will be no lack of books for them to choose from . . . I've got dozens on the block.  I'll be glad to sign a contract that will earn the publisher millions.

As for this $40 check . . . I'm going to help someone today.  I'll give someone my $40 worth one way or another.  And then, afterwards, I'm going to write some more.

Down at the bowling alley, there's a gumball with my name on it.

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