Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Treat This!

No, I don't have hemorrhoids.  Well, maybe I do, but that's beside the point here.  And even if I did have hemorrhoids, who would know?

What I do know is that I had a request yesterday to provide a "treatment" for a book  idea.  Now, in case you don't know what a treatment is, let me explain.  Treatment is a term generally batted around in script-writing and movie-tv-production circles to describe a brief summary, description, or overview of a visual idea.  It's a way for a script writer to describe his/her vision for the project and how it would actually go from script to screen.

But this is the first time I've had anyone use the word "treatment" in book conversation.  So I'm not sure what to do . . . .

I plan to sit down tonight and ponder these deep mysteries.  I'll probably end up writing an "overview" or book jacket description of what I hope to produce.  I'll slap "treatment" on the top of the page, smear a little butter on it, and mail it in.  I like my treatments spicy, so I might add clove.

Overall, though, I've been a healthy writer.  I work out.  Eat well.  Bath twice a week.  My doctor is amazed at how well I'm doing.  I've never had a broken bone.  Never had a surgery.  And I've never been treated for typhoid.  I once stepped on a rusty nail but didn't get lockjaw.  I've been bitten by dogs and did not foam at the mouth.  I've been bitten by snakes, but that's just what lawyers do . . . .

Anyway, I hope my treatment is a winner.  I might even start collecting these in my medicine cabinet.  My varied and sundry treatments would look great next to my licorice prescription and my extra-strength candy corn.

A writer, after all, has to have some vices.

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