Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Pirate Theology


Here's one I wrote many years ago for The Wittenburg Door before the magazine went under. Oh, how I miss that magazine! I miss poking fun at Robert Tilton and Joel Osteen and Benny Hinn and . . . yes, myself. And I do apologize for this one in advance. I'll answer for this one in hell. It's lame, but it's from the Hearrrrrtttt!

Pirate Theology

What did Jesus say we should cut off it it causes us to sin?
Our right ARRRRRRMMMM!

How does the Lord's Prayer begin?
Our Father, who ARRRRTTTT in heaven . . . .

What did Pilate ask Jesus?
ARRRRR you the king of the Jews?

What type of boat did Noah build?
An ARRRRKKKK!

What are the basic United Methodist beliefs called?
The ARRRRticles of RRRRReligion.

What type of fish did Peter catch?
Carrrrrrp!

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