Writing Letters

Lately I've been writing a copious amount of notes, cards and letters. This isn't as easy as it sounds. After all, penmanship suffers the more one uses the keyboard, the keypad or the thumbs to Twitter. Sometimes, after I've handwritten on paper, I have to ask myself, "What did I write?"

Recently, I left some handwritten instructions on the dining room table. It was a note that read: "I won't be home until later. Fix your own dinner."

I must have scrawled the message. My son thought the message said: "I want a large fillet mignon for dinner". And my wife interpreted the message to read: "I really want you after dinner."

I had neither, of course . . . although my son did pull four pounds of steak from the freezer that night and, when I returned home my wife, for some reason, was a bit frisky.

As a dad, I was always telling my kids, "Watch what you say."

Now I have to remind myself, "Watch what you write."

Incidentally, how do you spell "Porterhouse" and "Teddy Bear Nightie"?