Take the word "cute" for instance. I hear women using this word all the time to describe an outfit, a piece of home decor, or even a hairstyle. "That's a cute coat," they'll say. Or, "Oh, your hair looks so cute!" Other expressions I've heard recently are "adorable", "striking", or "becoming."
What these women are "becoming" I'm not sure. But according to the plethora of TV shows and movies on the subject, there are plenty of people becoming zombies.
One of the reasons I write so much love poetry is because I'm still trying to convince my wife that I love her. I tell her this every day, as in "I love you" or "can you bring me another banana!" but she doesn't always hear the love behind the words. That's why I carry a thesaurus. I can use other words and expressions at a moment's notice. As in, "you look delicious this morning," or "you're more scrumptious than a big ol' bag of fresh licorice."
I've tried using the word "cute", but evidently this is a woman's word. I used it once in a women's shoe store while my wife was trying on a pair of sandals, telling the clerk that she had cute eyelashes, but my wife didn't get the discount. When I tell my wife that her new outfit is "cute", she seems miffed, and asks, "Can't you come up with a better word than that?"
"How does humdinger, strike you?" I'll say. "How about jiggy? Arousing? Shakalaka-bing-bong?
Cute never cuts it. And if I don't come up with a fresh vocabulary very soon, my marriage may be in trouble.
I'm running out of words.
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