Advertising

(My driveway . . . coming very soon)



Recently I had a thought . . . I could write advertising copy or, rather, sell advertising by painting it on my cars. I could make it part of the "cash for clunkers" deal.

On the news this morning I heard someone say that the cash for clunkers didn't work because 85% of Americans do not have a clunker car that qualified. Obviously, these census-takers have not been to my house. I have four absolute pieces of crap sitting in my driveway. I know they would qualify because, on any given day one of them may not turn over, or may break down along the side of the road, or have a flat, or just stall while driving down the interstate. All of these things have happened in the past month. It's fun driving an Outcalt car.



So . . . why not make a little money on the side? Got a slogan you'd like to see as a traveling billboard? I'll paint it on the van: "Seniors Eat Free on Tuesdays at Elegance". That would fit nicely along the side of our 2001 Ford "Dungheap" Van. Or how about: "Got Hot Wings?" I could paint that on the tailgate of our 1993 Chevy 4X4 "Craphole" Pickup. Or how about: "Lowes" or "Kohls" or "KMart"? Any of those I could handpaint on the side panels of my 1991 Caprice "Black hole of Calcutta" wagon.


Believe me . . . it pays to advertise. Call BR-549 to check on my rates. I'm very reasonable and I can write anything!