Mi Hermano

Yesterday was my younger brother's birthday (I only have the one). I did send him a card last week, which I hope he has received by now . . . one of those funny Hallmark cards that costs five bucks. I just signed it, "Dude, have a good one." Don't know what that means.

But I should have written this in the card:

On your birthday
I hope you remember:
That I was the one who . . .
Taught you how to play hooky,
How to cheat at cards,
How to steal a cookie.
And on those December
Days that blow
I taught you how
To write your name in the snow.

And I was there
When you were bad,
And Dad
Whipped the tar
Out of your matted
And tattered jeans.
Heck, I was the one who ratted.
You mad?

And brother, that ain't
The half of it.
I took your money
And kissed it,
Then spent it on my honey.
Heck, you were a kid
And you didn't miss it.

That's why you can't forget
That I'm bigger and bolder,
You're the younger,
And I'm the older.
Which is why Mom
Loves me best
And you get the rest
Of what's left over.

So cheer up, man,
To me there's no other
I'd rather torment.
Happy birthday, brother!